Minneapolis Enneagram Leadership Coaching | One Foot Coaching

View Original

How to Choose Presence Over Presents This Christmas

Welcome to Advent. I don’t always celebrate it the way you might be thinking. You know with the purple and pink candles and all. It was just never on our radar growing up so I didn’t carry it with me into adulthood.

All that to say, I like the idea of Advent. The purpose…is to prepare our hearts for the coming of Jesus. Just like Israel at the time of Jesus’ birth, the time of advent helps us prepare for Emmanuel - God with us. At the time, Israel hadn’t heard from God for over 400 years. And i don’t know about you, but sometimes it can feel like that with us when our devotional times get stale, and there is too much hurry and hustle.

Reflecting on Advent past

The reason I bring all this up is because I’m reflecting back today, well yesterday. Reflecting back several years when Advent became more than families lighting a candle during church on Sunday and saying a prayer. Several years ago I partnered with our then worship pastor (he’s now my pastor) to introduce Advent Conspiracy to our church family.

The concept? Give presence over presents and use the extra money you save on less presents to do some good in your world. The result? We raised over $ 60,000 that year to build wells in Haiti and to make affordable housing happen in Minneapolis. But the greatest lesson was choosing to be present with our people.

I reflected on all this as I sat in church yesterday listening to our first message on Intentional Christmas. What I want for you and for myself is an intentional Christmas. Where we get to choose being present with our people over the hustle and commercialism that has become Christmas. If you’re anything like me, you’ve committed to intentional Christmas before only to find yourself madly rushing for all those gifts and recommit each year to take one step closer to slowing down and enjoying the season. If you have questions on taking the next step in being intentional this Christmas, I have some thoughts on how to choose presence over presents this Christmas….

Presence with God

A few years ago now, I heard a podcast that brought tears to my eyes. The podcast was an interview with Ellie Holcomb and Annie F. Downs and they were talking about the beauty of Advent. More specifically, they spoke of the true reason for advent - we are waiting for the presence of Jesus.

Advent is about waiting for God to show up in our lives. Advent is about waiting and longing for Him to act. It was true on that first Christmas and it’s true for us today.

See this Amazon product in the original post

What I loved about that podcast is that is normalized the waiting. Those ladies had both been waiting for God to break through in some area in their lives. I know there are seasons of waiting on God for me and I’m guessing you have your own seasons of waiting.

You and I may be invited by God to wait for our dreams, our people, emotional and financial breakthrough, or maybe even healing. But advent and breakthrough are really about the same things. An encounter with God’s presence. Advent is about seeking Him and finding Him in the waiting. And you and I? We find choosing presence over presents when we choose to make Advent what the first Advent was about. The presence of Jesus.

Some thoughts on how to do this? Pick up an advent devotional where you can read each day about the coming of Jesus. (You can order the one I’m using this year in the picture on the right). Or another idea I read on social media. Read a chapter of Luke each day. There’s 24 so it leads you right up to Christmas Eve. And then, spend time with God.

Be present with yourself

We can’t be present with our people until we are present with ourselves. When you and I are present to our own hearts, the overflow is being present with our people.

I find that sometimes the rush and hurry is a way for me to avoid getting real with myself and those around me. If I keep going. If I keep checking my social media accounts. If I keep answer emails. If I keep myself busy. I don’t know what you’re thing is, but choosing to be present with yourself clears the clutter so you can reconnect with you, connect with your heart, and learn to accept all of you - the stuff you embrace and the stuff you hide from the world.

What helps you get present with yourself? One thing that’s helped me is learning about myself through the Enneagram. The Enneagram has helped me cultivate self-awareness and understand why I do what I do. Once I started understanding my why, I was able to clear the clutter of what holds me back and set aside the things I do to keep me from being present. And in the end, I was able to embrace who God made me to be and love the people He placed in my life.

When you and I can get present with ourselves, we become more accepting of others. We become more open to the people around us. We fully engage in giving presence out of the overflow of our hearts.

Being present with your people

Back when we first started exploring Advent Conspiracy, this was not necessarily a new concept for me. But, it was one that I hadn’t really practiced. The key back then was to think more about experiences and less about physical gifts we could give.

What I’ve found that when I get present to myself. When I become more self-aware about how I see the world. When I choose to reconnect with my heart. It’s then that I naturally lean into being present with the people I care about.

After that, it starts with making a choice. Choose to get eyeball to eyeball. Choose to put down our phones or whatever else keeps us from connecting. Choose to be curious even if you’ve know your people for years. Choose to get real. Choose experiences.

One of the best ideas from that first Advent Conspiracy? Finding experiences we can do together…me & my people and you and yours. It can be as simple as dinner out and checking in, playing games together while you talk about real life, seeing Christmas lights, or baking together. Whatever your thing? Choosing to slow down, stop the hustle, and be present for your people is the greatest gift you can give.

Hey friends! I’m always looking for new ideas to be present with my people. Drop a comment with your favorite presence cultivating activity and we’ll do this together this Christmas!

See this gallery in the original post